Deliverance

Finally, on September 27, I decided to dedicate, faithfully, 15 minutes each day to scripture study. The key word here is "decided." It was a full choice, a determined choice, one that I meant to employ 100%. I 100% meant it.

I've kept a reading journal since then, as my bishop instructed me to do so many moons ago.

I've been humbled.

My friends, remember Naaman? He was a leper. He was a prominent citizen, well-liked, respected. But a leper. It was suggested to him that the prophet could heal him. So he went to the prophet's house and the prophet's servant came out and told him to bathe in the river 7 times, then he'd be healed.

Can you imagine? How absurd, how simple! "Lord, how shall I be healed?" "go dip in the river seven times." What? What does that have to do with leprosy? What does that have to do with a great powerful healing from a prophet? Naaman kinda threw a fit about it, and I can't be sure that I would have behaved differently. Then his friend told him that even though it was the prophet's messenger, and even though it was simple, he should still try it. He did, and of course he was healed.

I have been told to read my scriptures. And I have been. But, it's been sans commitment. Sans faith. Sans determination. Sans consistency.

Finally, on September 27th, I dove in. I rushed to the waters of Jordan and bathed, with faith, with surrender.

The experience, reader, has been a healing one. Fifteen minutes a day is rarely long enough. I can't get enough of the sweet words in the Book of Mormon. I can't get enough of the parallels to my own life. I can't get enough of the sweet, sweet love of the Savior.

I began my purposeful reading in the book of Alma, and every day for about a week, I studied stories of deliverance. God delivers the faithful. Time after time after time, He delivers His people. From all kinds of bondage. Alma and Amulek suffered prison, starvation, isolation, mockery from the people they loved and wanted to save. They suffered so much more than I have in my lifetime, and they were so much more righteous than I. God doesn't withhold life's bitter experiences from anyone. But, He has/does/will deliver His faithful children. Alma and Amulek knew that. They knew their sufferings would be temporary, and that God would deliver them. Which He did. I am inspired by the faith of these great missionaries.

As I read about the great conversion of King Lamoni and his queen and so very many others, I wondered why won't God give me an experience like that to change my heart immediately? Lamoni basically went from sinner to saint in just longer than a moment. Why not me? Why not send me this great miracle, knock me out for a few hours, change my heart and free me from these chains of sin forever?

Then I realized, I have all the knowledge and the tools I need to humble my own self, and to submit my own heart for cleansing.

I have so much to say! This is so long already! More is coming.