Vashti is my new hero. You know her? She was the Queen of Persia, Esther's predecessor.
I'm searching for stories of courage. I want courage to be a word that defines me. I love the word courage. I long for it to be a part of my story. I want courage coursing through my veins.
I have a long way to go.
Esther is certainly a courageous woman. I love that she approached the king un-summoned, which could have been a death sentence. I love her fearless "If I perish, I perish." I need to say that myself. If I give my will to God and die, I die! I'm not going to die, but with the fear I have about doing it, death may as well be waiting. Sheesh.
Anyway, Vashti, friends! Vashti was courageous, too. Why don't we talk about her? I love her. I totally identify with her, that rebel. Allow me to summarize (with my own interpretations) the story.
So, here's the king, and he's got this big feast going on, for the men in the kingdom. Nobles, princes, servants, etc. They're all drinking and feasting and partying it up ancient-royalty style. So, Vashti's like, "Why he gets a party and I don't?" and so she throws a banquet for the women. Well, the men are drunk and they want something pretty to lust after, so they request to see Vashti. The scriptures say they want to see her because she's beautiful. Well, the king agrees, and sends for his wife.
Vashti says no.
Vashti says no to her husband! She says no to the king of 127 provinces! She was a woman, not a plaything; she was a woman, not a display! She was a woman, and she knew it, and she said no.
I am so proud of her. I imagine she knew that if she said no and publicly humiliated the king, that she would pay severe consequences. And she did. She lost her crown, her husband, her home. But she kept her dignity, and her integrity.
I love that woman! I want to be that courageous.
In other news, I have completed Step Four! FINALLY! And by "completed," I mean it has a beginning, a middle, and an end. It may never be completed, but for the purpose of Step Four, it's done. It took me over a year to face it!!
God is good. Recovery is possible. I'm going to it now. No more waiting for it to come to me.
Ohhh I LOVE that! She isn't anyone I'd paid attention to before. I'm totally going to read her story today. I agree though, I LOVE that she didn't sell her virtue and dignity. She is definitely an awesome role model for us!
ReplyDeleteGREAT job completing Step 4! It took me forever to complete my 4 too. I was so worried I wouldn't do it right. But in the end, like you, I decided to just to it the best I could and then go from there. I found once I completed my first 4 and 5 that it opened up my memory for other things and I quickly did a follow up 4 and 5 right after my first one. Peeling that first layer of onion exposed the next layer and with that new memories. Not a ton, but enough that I wanted to take care of them and give them away right away.
Do you have someone to work your 5 with there?
No. I don't know who to work Step Five with. Maybe you? Or maybe you know someone?
ReplyDeleteThat's why I was asking. Just putting it out there. I've listented to long distant Step 5's before. Or, there are a number of women in my group that could do it as well (they are grounded in the steps and have listened to Step 5's as well). Maybe pray about it and see what the Lord directs. But, I am available if you need.:-) Just email me directly for more info/questions.
DeleteWAY TO GO!!!! Remember I'm reading and posting in order, so some of my older posts no longer apply. Good on you, Erin!
ReplyDelete