Day 2 Day 1

I'm going to do a post a day for 30 days. I need to refocus on recovery.

However, I don't have much to say tonight! ha!

God has granted me serenity after my last slip. He is wonderful and kind and so merciful. He is reminding me that my destiny is with Him. He is reminding me that I was made to overcome. He is reminding me that He will fight for me.

I need to reach out  more. When I am feeling those first feelings of the idea of indulging, I need to reach out. I wish I had a sponsor. One of my bishops used to ask me to text him when I was feeling weak or tempted, even if it was in the middle of the night. He gave me his personal cell phone number! It still trips me out that my bishop gave me his personal cell phone and asked me and allowed me to text  him. So weird! And so amazing. But he was 2 bishops ago, 3 years ago, and since then I haven't really had someone I feel comfortable reaching out to in those moments.

I have a wonderful friend who, upon reading my last blog post, reached out to me and told me she is there for me if and when I need to reach out. And, well, that meant the world. So I'm going to practice this. I'm going to humble myself and try to get past the pride of "I can do this," or "I don't need help," or "It's not that big of a deal anyway," or "I don't want to bother anyone with my crap." She made it clear, anyway, that I wouldn't be bothering her and that I could feel safe in reaching out to her and I'm just going to believe her and do it. I'm going to make myself practice it. I'm going to trust. I need to try something new.

I need to get back to the temple. I'm not letting another slip stop me again. No way.