Believing He Can vs Believing He Will

In the past few months, God has rebuilt my faith. I am blessed to have always had a faith in God the Father, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost. I have always believed they exist and they love me. I have held onto this belief through this addiction, and it's what has kept me coming back after every fall. I know that not all are blessed with faith, and I am so grateful for mine.

Over the months, my faith has evolved. It used to be, when I prayed for something, the thoughts that were just below the conscious level were, "I believe He can, but I don't believe He will. He has the power, but I'm not worthy to receive these blessings. I'm just me; no one special. He might bless me with what I seek if it's what is going to be best for my family, and if it's easy for Him, but He probably actually wants me to suffer so I can learn more."

Now, my faith is more like this: "I believe He can, and I believe He will." I believe He will bless me with what I hope to receive! I believe He will bless me with the desires of my heart, unless withholding those blessings will ultimately bless me and my family more. If the answer is no, then I know that something better is coming. My faith is now that He doesn't want me to suffer. He wants me to be of good cheer.

If I had the resources to grant my children their every desire, and I knew that they would be grateful, humble, charitable and productive, then you bet I would do everything they wanted. Think about that. If my daughter asked me for a Pony, and I knew that she would take very good care of that pony, and I knew she would be ever grateful for that pony, and tell everyone not that she got it for herself, but that I got it for her, and I knew that she would make kids' days by offering free pony rides to those who would otherwise have no opportunity to ride a pony, and if I knew getting her a pony wouldn't distract her from her other duties, and if I had the resources to get her a pony--- then I would give her a pony. If, however, she asked for a pony and I knew in my heart that she would not be grateful, would not share, and would take the pony for granted, I would not give her a pony.

I don't know God's criteria for answering prayers. Oh wait, the scriptures tell us: "Ask and ye shall receive." Interesting to note, it doesn't say, "Ask and ye shall receive what you asked for," but it says, "ask and ye shall receive." God knows us better than we know ourselves and He knows our needs. So when I ask Him to take this addiction from me, He doesn't seem to want to do that. But, He still gives. He gives me strength to bear the afflictions of addiction. And do you know what? That is better for me, far better, than to have this addiction totally removed. But, I am much better off asking Him to cure me than I would be not praying about it at all. Now, I also ask Him for strength, and that He gives liberally, according to my faith and obedience. He gives me strength and I still have to work through the temptations and cravings. And every time I have another victory, I learn something. I grow closer to Him. And He gives me yet more strength and love. I am thankful that He has not yet granted my request to have the addiction taken away.

Here's the thing. Since my faith has gone from "Believing that He can" to "Believing that He will," I have seen more miracles in my life. I have seen His hand in my every day duties. I know He will help me because He has helped me; He is helping me. I know He hears my cries because He meets my spoken needs, and then some. You know that scripture that says something like when a man asks you to walk a mile, walk with him two miles? When a man asks you for your coat, give him your cloak also? Our Heavenly Father is the perfect example of doing just that. He gives me more than I ask for, when I ask in faith. If I asked for a pony, maybe He'd give me a pony plus a barn. He is a kind and generous God who gives and gives and gives. Believe that He will, and He will.