A Small but Sweet Victory

Early this morning, I received a message in my Facebook inbox. It was from Jake. He'd sent it late last night. "Hi," was all it said.

But it actually said, "come away with me, and destroy yourself. Come away with me from the arms of Jesus, and have some fun. Come with me, and I will make you forget all the rotten stuff in your life. Come, let's go forget the world, forget your goals, you can always repent later. You know you want this. Regret is for the morning."

Jake is the guy from this post. In case you don't want to read it, here's a summary: It was July 2010, and I "met" this guy on Facebook through a dear friend. Jake seemed way cool and we had talked to each other on my friend's page a few times. We seemed to have a lot in common, so we became Facebook friends. In almost no time at all, he was telling me about all this sexual stuff that he was into. He sent me links to show me what he was talking about. I clicked. He and I talked.

The next day, I "unfriended" him. I probably gave him a long, ridiculous explanation. I probably apologized. I never sought him out again. I didn't hear from him at all till last night.

"Hi."

Two and half years later, this guy shows up out of nowhere!

I admit that for a moment, I wanted to know what he wanted. I wanted to see if I could lie to myself just enough to respond. I knew what a response would do. A small part of me desired it. But a large part of me wanted nothing to do with it. I deleted his message and went to his profile only to block him. I hope that makes it so he can't message me again.

NOT TODAY! Not me, not this, not now! I don't blame Jake. I'm not upset with him. I don't think he's evil. But he doesn't belong in any tiny corner of my life. To my spirit, he's not Jake- he's a deadly serpent. The Serpent was laying out a trap, and I didn't bite. Not this time!

I'm so excited about this! And I think it's okay for me to celebrate small victories, as long as I acknowledge my Source of strength. What a merciful God we have. I'm so grateful that this happened on a day when I felt strong enough. I'm so grateful I have been healed sufficiently to protect me from what might have been. I'm not saying I'm healed. But I'm healthier than I was a week ago, and there has certainly been some healing, wrought by the Atonement.

What if I'd received the same message 3 weeks ago? I don't know what I would have done. But today, I didn't yield.

I'm going to tell you something. The high I have from winning that battle is sweeter and longer lasting than the high I'd have experienced from following the Serpent into the dark. And it's real. You know? It's a genuine high.

I had a choice this morning. I'm grateful for the choice, and I'm so pleased that I made the right one.